Ordinarily I would offer an anecdote in exchange for taking up part of the post with an exhortation to read my books, on which I worked quite hard, and which are notable for their availability.
I'm not doing that today because I'm really a very busy person. Do you think that all I ever have to do is sit around and try to be entertaining? No, fuckers! I barely have time to shove a fistful of almonds into my teeth before I have to go put out some form of easily preventable fire.
Read the fucking books! They're short, and I did my damnedest to make it worth more than the investment. I'm not asking you to choke down Infinite Jest so you can finally tell your cousin you thought it was or was not smart without lying through your teeth. We're all straightforward people here, and we like words. I think we can do business. You want paperbacks, is that it? Coming soon. I just need to find the scratch to mind the gap.
--JL
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