#271

A UK company made a role-playing game called Disco Elysium a while ago. It looked very interesting to me. Couple of days ago, or just yesterday--hard to be sure--I got it for sale as an "out-of-work-sad-sack" present to myself (so far, I have failed to properly schedule an achieved interview to become a school bus driver [because phones are stupid and everything to do with phones is stupid and everything that involves a phone in the ordinary course of its being-in-the-world is severely compromised by a great and voracious stupidity] and am working out the details of an interview to work at the local movie theater downtown) and the game has, indeed, been interesting.

Interesting fuck. Interesting completely consuming my brain how will I ever get free. Monsters wrote this fucking thing. Prancing devils. Thank God for them.

*

Watching Twin Peaks for what must be the seventh or eighth time, but only the fourth time I've had access to all the Log Lady intros. It's good; when I'm massively absorbed in the dense minutiae of the aforementioned works, the overwhelming, heavy, bitter draughts of dense depression I am currently imbibing are more or less lightened on my tongue. I am okay with being depressive and am pretty good at performing at least three tasks a day and generally surviving while depressed, which means I've lived long enough to be depressed a lot, which brings me to the point: it's a bad one. Yeah. No joke. My tide is at a low, low ebb. But doing quite well, considering. Taking care of chores, keeping busy. Showering adequately and brushing my teeth. 

*

Encanto is the best thing Disney has made in years, maybe ever, and I really like a lot of Disney stuff. The vitality in this thing is just insane. The beauty of it, the savor. Colombia is such a neighbor to Venezuela in all things that never in my life have I experienced such a total familiarity with everything on the screen and coming out of the speakers, even though it was fantastical and magical in more ways than one. Beautifully, brilliantly written. They did very well. They got it good and made it right.

Hey, look. I don't like loving Disney stuff. Shit just is what it is. They got me and continue to get me. Let that say what it says about me. Fuck whoever has a problem with it right back.

*

Been too depressed to give my soul to reading. Does sometimes happen that the particular weapon the depression wields consists of leaving me unable to approach books with my usual fervor. This is grim stuff, since books are so helpful and shore up the self so well, but games can, as I have often stated, mind the gap; and at any rate I can say that I have been pecking slowly at a couple things:

The Book of Barely Imagined Beings: a 21st Century Bestiary, by Caspar Henderson (this book is so damn fucking good damn damn it is hot shit)

You and I Eat the Same, essays and information by and from a bunch of people, put out by MAD Dispatches (MAD in this case being a Danish food nonprofit), edited by Chris Ying, foreword by René Redzepi

*

Haha anyway depression lol

--JL