#306

Made mention yesterday of how yard work is perhaps not my preferred task; not really my thing. Did some yesterday and even more today, and this served as a reminder that often, at least when under your own steam as opposed to under coercion--and if one can do it under coercion, more power to one--the trick to activity is to just bear with it till the endorphins kick in and you can lose yourself in it, do philosophy, listen to the voice of God. This can take a lot of time, but I believe there's a knack for it one can foster and encourage within themselves. Some people are probably born with it, but growing up, I had to force myself to do anything I didn't immediately enjoy and demonstrate a talent for.

If you are like this yourself, I recommend sticking with stuff--the payoff's pretty good even if the thing is bullshit and doesn't really matter. One of the great significances of life is giving meaning of yourself to whatever lies before you. Also in raising your skill ceiling whenever possible, gaining cross-class skills, just generally increasing your capacity. There is joy in watching your own numbers go up before they inevitably roll back to zero. The question of where we put our points is the question of who we are as people, which, personally, is a vital question indeed.

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Plip ploop! These posts sure are a lot of nothing. Well, I'm finding my way back to it. Though pointlessness is the name of this game, so, I really can't lose, except when I make a point, which is still an ironic win. Tasting nothing but pure victory, time after time, baby. Love it.

Will tomorrow be the day my words catch fire and I give this space something more real, brighter, harder, alive? Something to chew on and come into? Strap in. Maybe for nothing. Who knows! Uncertainty rules this chaotic existence with an wavering, unsteady scepter.

PEACE, MUTHAFUX

--JL